Long McMahon Family Promo Like 2000: RAW opened with Stephanie McMahon making her one annual appearance. She basically said Hunter wasn’t going to wrestle tonight. She said Curtis Axel was beneth him and I facepalmed. She got booed for cancelling Hunters match. She said it was for her husbands well being and then asked the crowd to not be selfish.
Vince came out at this point. Vince acted like a face until he got in to heel mode with his daughter. He asked the crowd to not boo her and said she was right in her decision to cancel the match. He then also said Axel was benneth the almighty HHH. Then things looked to get interesting when THE SHIELD came out but the bastards cut to commercial. Upon the return from commercial they showed us what happened on the App and well Vince and Steph just left and I said WHAT A FUCKING RIPOFF.
Team Hell No and Orton vs The Shield: Ambrose got the pin on Bryan after hitting the headlock DDT. This was a good match and Bryan really goes all out in these matches with the Shield which are really becoming the highlight of RAW these days. This was great shame it all went downhill quickly.
Punk and Jericho will sign their contract for their match at the PPV tonight.
Backstage: Bryan was yelling at that cunt Randy Orton so good for Bryan. Orton tried to get him to calm down Bryan said Orton thought he was the weak link as well but Orton denied this claim. Bryan said he would wrestle again tonight and prove hes not the weak link.
HHH Arives: Well God…. I mean HHH arrived late and went looking for Vince. He then found Vince and Steph and asked what was going on. So Vince then said Axel was really good even though earlier he said Axel was beneth Hunter. Anyway Vince told Hunter to consider not doing the match. Hunter said hes wrestling and asked who would stop him. At this moment I thought oh god they are going to bring out his kids to convince him.
TIme To Check Out The Heat Game: Usos beat Prime Time Players as I assume hundreds of thousands of viewers tuned into TNT to watch Game 7 at this moment.
Langston/Del RIo 5: Well Del Rio once again got his win back and im sure Langston will win match #6 on Smackdown just so no one gets over.
Speaking Of Over Heres Another Sheamus Squash: Sheamus beat Cody for I think the 1000th time with the kick. Sandow was on commentary trying to get people to care about this mess. After the match Sheamus punched out Snadow yep remeber Kids To Be A Star.
Hunter and Steph were arguing man it really felt like 2000 again. Anyway Hunter left and told Steph next week hes wrestling Axel.
They then recapped The Ryback killing Kofi on Smackdown.
Bryan was then pacing bakstage and ran into THE RYBACK. THE RYBACK called him the weak link. So heres our 2nd Bryan match for the night.
Heyman and Axel met with Vince. Vince said Axel would not wrestle Hunter next week. He then made A Cena/Axel rematch in a no dq match.
FANDANGO vs KHALI: Well time to check the Heat game again. By the way FANDANGO walked out the match. Miz came out on the ramp and Barrett gave him the elbow thing.
Miz vs Barrett: Miz then beat Barrett with the Figure Four. Why the fuck is Miz using that move I mean Buddy Rogers to Flair then to Miz its just not right. I think Miz has no idea who Buddy Rogers is anyway. Also Barrett is just dead in the water.
Contract Signing: Punk did not show up. Heyman signed the contract for Punk. Jericho then signed after Heymn asked him if he wanted to face Punk in Chicago. By the way they wrestled in Chicago last year at Extreme Rules. Jericho then said he would wrestle Punk anywhere including Hartford which got a pop. Jericho then stuffed the contract into Heymans pants yep time to watch The Heat again.
Speaking of The Heat they did a divas match which im sure no one cared for.
They aried a new Wyatt Family Promo.
The Ryback vs Daniel Bryan: Bryan gave Ryback arguably the best match hes ever had. Ryback powerbombed Bryan through a tabled causing the DQ win. After the match Ryback tried to do what he did to Kofi to Bryan but Superman came out and made the save.
Cena vs Axel II: Well 3rd week in a row Axel got a win that does nothing for him. Is it really going to hurt Cena to loose clean to a guy you want to make a star. It makes a new opponent for Cena down the road this is how you build up heels you fucking idiots. Instead we got a countout finish.
Overall: WWE rewrote this show over the weekend when they found out they were going against Game 7 and then Vince made them re-write it on Monday morning. What did we get wet got a bunch of segments with Vince and Steph and some really stupid matches that probably lost alot of viewers to the NBA.