RAW opened with the annual Memorial Day video saying thanks to the armed forces. They announced a HHH update will be deleivered later on.
John Cena Makes His Return: So Cena came back no selling any injury from the PPV last week. He outright denied the Ambulance Match with Ryback cos why not. He said the match will now be a 3 Stages Of Hell Match. For Reference on a 3 Stages Of Hell match please watch this match https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grMI0-hXwIU I tell you that Ryback/Cena will not even be half as good. Anyway Cena announced that the 1st fall will be a Lumberjack Match, The 2nd will be a Table Match and the 3rd fall if needed which it will is going to be the Ambulance Match. Ryback came out and said he was Satan which was nice to know. He accepted the match and then left.
Cena meets Mr Axel: After that whole thing Heyman came out with Axel who is now Curtis Axel and not Curt. Heyman said he would be a future WWE Champion. Heyman made Cena vs Axel which Cena accepted.
Langston vs Del Rio III: Del Rio won after rolling up Langston. There was no need for this to be on RAW seeing Del RIo beat Langston on Main Event. Also AJ just causes all the men around her to loose matches so shes fucking dumb.
Daniel Bryan meets Bret Hart: Bryan was pacing in front of Kane and Kane was trying to assure Bryan he is not the weak link in the team. Kane told him to pull himself together and Bryan took this as Kane saying he was the weak link. They then argued until Bret Hart showed up. Bret said the same thing as Kane and Bryan called Him the The Best There Was, Is and Ever Will Be.
Kofi vs Ambrose 10: Yeah Ambrose won pretty easily with the headlock DDT. Once again why were these two wrestling again. After Ambrose won Rollins and Reigns came out to celebreate with Ambrose. Kane and Bryan ran out as a commerical went to air.
The Shield vs Team Hell No: So the match started during the commercial but if you have the WWE you didn’t miss it. Daniel Bryan is so good when he is wrestling these guys he just goes all out and I wish he was feuding with Ambrose for the US title. Reigns hit a knee onto Kane off of the top rope to get the win for the Shield.
Cole tired to sell to us that Bryan worked so hard that he may of cost them the win.
HHH UPDATE: Yeah hes not at RAW but he will be back next week.
WWEACTIVE: Miz as Ref, Commentator or Announcer YOU DECIDE.
WWE ACTIVE RESULTS: MIZREF got 85% of the vote
FANDANGO vs Barrett: FANDANGO won after Miz hit the skull crushing finale to Barrett. So its not even like FANDANGO won the match but rather Miz won the match.
After the match Miz shoved FANDANGO and his dancer onto the floor and counted 3 for whatever reason.
HBK RETURNS and tells Cena not to wrestle cos of what happend to Hunter last week. Oh my dear Shawn this is John Cena he never feels pain unlike that mortal HHH.
Nattie celebrated her birthday and Slater pushed the midget into the cake.
3MB vs Khali and The 2 Fat Fucks. Clay got the win after pinning Slater and who could possibly care. After the match Khali led the singing of Happy Birthday to Nattie.
Highlight Reel with Jericho and Heyman: So Jericho kept asking about Punk and Heyman kept talking about Axel and Lesnar. Heyman said he would have an announcement about Punks return later. Jericho bought up that the next PPV would be in Chicago and Heyman accepted a match between Punk and Jericho.
WWE hates Nattie: So on her birthday they had one of the bellas pin Nattie. The Bellas sang Happy Birthday as Nattie cried fuck I dont blame her.
The Wyatt Family is coming soon!!!
Orton and Sheamus vs Rhodes Scholars: We are Rhodes and Sandow still a team. Well Sheamus pinned Sandow cos WHY THE FUCK NOT.
Orton vs Ambrose was announced for Smackdown. Hello DQ Finish.
Cole plugged Bret Hart Apreciation Night on the WWE APP. Lawler made a joke about his Heart Attack.
Axel vs Cena: Axel won by Countout after the Ambulance showed up and Cena went to look at it. Cena searched for Ryback and he wasn’t in the car but he attacked Cena from behind. Cena got Ryback into the AA but Ryback got out and pushed Cena off of the stage. Cena looked on as Axel celebrated in the ring.
Overall: Meh I guess. Besides them announcing Punks return and the new Main Event for the PPV nothing happened.