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WWE Raw April 15th 2013: WWE Hates Their Champions

After the greatness of last weeks post WrestleMania RAW the bloom was off the rose this week. WWE is back to doing shit no one cares about and burying their champions besides Cena in the process. Sounds like a fun show so lets get into it.

Sheamus and Orton vs Big Show: RAW began with an actual match this week which was something. So Orton and Sheamus are doing the 2-1 against Big Show. They hit both their finishers onto Show to get the win. Meh

3MB actually called out the Shield and I laughed my ass off

The Geeks Are Still Geeks: So 3MB called out the Shield cos they totally have a chance to beat these guys who have not lost a match. So BROCK LESNAR came out instead which was in all honesty better than seeing the Shield come out. So Brock killed the geeks with ease. This crowd was into Brock beating the shit out of these geeks and so was I.

Brock vs HHH One More Time: So Heyman took the mic and cut a promo. He said that Brock wants a fight with HHH well what was that we saw at Mania. Heyman continued and said he respected Hunter for what he was able to do to Brock at Mania. Brock did not agree with Heyman here. So Heyman challenged HHH to an Old Skool Cage Match and the group I talk to on Facebook all want the old Blue Bars if we are going old school.

WWE hates Cesaro and Failed Kofi Push 500: Yeah I have a lot to say about this. Cesaro lost the belt to Kofi and it makes me wonder what the fuck they are doing with Cesaro now cos hes certinally not getting a push up the card with the spot hes in now. Im getting sick of these stop/star pushes with Kofi either push him all the way or just give up on the guy its been 5 fucking years of this IC and US title nonsense. I really hated everything about this.

Backstage: Kofi told Josh he has just bought the US Title Home; Yeah sure cos for those who don’t know Kofi was born in Ghana who at one time pretended he was Jamaican. Yep he just oozes American Patriotism. 

Dolph Celebrates His World Title Win: Dolph came out with his Crew and yes I still fucking hate Aj with a burning passion. Dolph called his title win the greatest moment in RAW history and honestly its up there. Dolph says he showsoff better than anyone because hes better than everyone else. So He made out with AJ until Vickie came out. So Vickie said Del Rio is getting a match RIGHT NOW cos you know that makes sense.

Ziggler vs Del Rio: So before we had any form of match Swagger and Zeb came out. Zeb said Ziggler only won the title cos of Swagger. Del Rio and Swagger brawled with Swagger putting Del RIo in the ankle lock.

Backstage: Del Rio was being tended to by a trainer.

PTP vs Team Hell No 1000: Great another match ive seen 1000 times before. Same result Hell No won wow what shock. But hey they announced Team Hell No and Taker vs The Shield for next week which im down for.

Ryback explains his actions: Ryback got a video explaining his reasons for turining on Cena last week. His main reason was that Cena had a better WrestleMania than he did. Yes he beat up Cena last week cos He lost a match to Mark Henry cos he couldn’t hold Henry up for his finisher. Anyway Ryback then went through his history with Cena and that hes out for the WWE title. This was pretty great.

Another WWE Champion Looses: Yeah they beat Barrett this time to R FUCKING TRUTH. Yeah R-Truth who has done jack shit since 2011 pinned Wade Barrett. Do WWE hate Barrett and Cesaro cos they guys could be main eventing PPV shows in 6 months if booked right but instead they have to loose every fucking match they are in and Im fucking over it.

Backstage: Just to coninue my anger they had Teddy Long in a segment yeah I hate his gimmick to. He was with Vickie and Maddox. Yeah so Teddy decided he wanted to see Swagger and Dolph have a match tonight for whatever reason. Why the fuck is Teddy trying to get matches booked on RAW and what power does he even have in 2013.

Team Rhodes Scholars WIN A MATCH: Yes Cody and Sandow won a fucking match. Khali and Santinio just need to go away and never come back send them away and bring back William Regal to RAW.

No One Care For FANDANGO: After all the hype the past week about FANDANGO and the term Fandangoing this crowd did not care at all. It was note to me that he has a new dancer this week which I would never of guessed if it was not mentioned. FANDANGO asked if the crowd want to FANDANGO and they didn’t care. This was really bad after last week.

They anounced Sheamus and Orton vs Show and Henry for Smackdown. Will they finally turn Orton.

Cena was backstage and siad he had to go to the ring to meet Face To Face With The Ryback.

THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION LOST: Yep Ziggler is back to loosing matches after 1 week. Swagger won with a rollup just to further baffle me as to why WWE is just beating all of its champions tonight.

Del Rio came back to beat up Swagger again cos yeah haven’t seen that over the last 6 weeks. Oh and Del Rio put him in the armbreaker haven’t seen that either.

Punks Return: Punk made his return to address his loss to Taker. Punk said he always looked for the next challenge and bough up his matches with Rock and the match with Taker. Punk paused as the fans chanted for Taker and then Punk gave the mic to Heyman and walked out the arena. I don’t know were this is leading

Backstage: Booker yelled at Teddy for booking that damn match Hell I’d be yelling to. Booker made a Del Rio, Ziggler and Swagger 3 way match I assume for the PPV but he didn’t say a date.

Cena Meets Face To Face With The Ryback: Cena called out Ryback who did his entrance who got into Cenas face when he entered the ring and then talked like a normal man for this segment which was odd. There was a feed me more chant. The director fucked up and he showed the shield getting ready to make their entrance. Cena said Ryback wasn’t the biggest threat to the title cos NO ONE IS IN WWE. Cena continued and said Ryback had no Brains or Balls. Ryback just took all this while Lawler covered up the Directors fuck up. So they walked up face to face until Ryback bailed. THE SHIELD came out.

Ryback watched from the ramp as the Shield got in the ring and killed Cena. Michael Cole wondered why Ryback would not help Cena. Well Mr Cole, RYBACK HATES JOHN CENA. Shield hit the powerbomb on Cena to end the show.

Thoughts: This was the biggest departure from last weeks show. They killed all their champions to guys who have no business beating their champions. They did the Brock return well and that was the highlight of this show and nothing comes close.

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